Lies, Damn Lies and Statistics

Says Ansari.

Followed up by "welcome to the torture chamber". He never skips a beat. The mark of a true professional.

He is by far my favorite teacher of my favorite class, and here's a testament why:

1. He is random...actually, he is the definition of random.



In the top right corner, we have a boomerang. Below that we have a hot dog...or is it a pickle...or a hot dog on a pickle...or is it a ba-na-na?

2. He has a sensitive side.

According to Arif, "if you have a sensitive topic to discuss, please don't discuss it in class. Come to my office hours".

3. He's also a scientist and nutrionist.

According to Arif, people get fat because their body has "more nutrients than genetics can handle".

4. Not to mention a social scientist.

According to Arif, Wal-Mart shoppers are junkies because they shop there 55 times a year.

5. He has an appreciation for interpretive art.



While referencing cloud watching, he draws the above picture. What could it be...a face? Hmm...

Well this is only half the picture...



This is the complete picture. What do you see now? A slice of pizza? Maybe pie? Perhaps cake? Nope! A piece of cut fruit, according to Arif. Of course...why didn't I think of that.

Tonight was one of those rare weeknights when I don't have class and there's a Lakers game on...against the hated Spurs, no less. And it was terrible!!! I am normally not upset with a loss...but this one was just so disgusting and terrible and upsetting at the end. First, Tim Duncan calls a timeout...and he doesn't have the ball! Ah! He gets away with a lot. A lot. Is that what happens when you're old? Second, I have no idea why they called a "foul" on Fisher. That stupid Mason dude totally fell back, and poor Fisher was just trying to scoot away! And it was that lame free throw that gave them the lead. And finally and perhaps most heinous, what the heck was that travel call on Ariza? Seriously? There were 3 Spurs all over him. And! He dribbled!! And not to mention that good-for-nothing Sun Yue played...probably only 5 seconds like the last game, but still...such a lowlight.

Looks like KG may not want to quit his day job anytime soon. This really isn't American Idol material.

1, 2, 3...Martini!!

Says the photographer.

Over the Christmas break, my mom (in spite of my complaining) signed the family up for our very first (and last) family picture taking.

It's not that I totally dislike picture taking (just a little, sometimes), it's more that I really take issue with super-posed and choreographed pictures. What am I going to do with it anyway?

But of course, she won and the family was off to Kaanapali. As suspected, the photographer was cloying cheerful...and she even told me and Nicole not to "get dirty" with the poses!!! Hmm...

Anyway, here are some of the pictures:



I'm not a fan of the matchy-matchy outfits!



The photographer liked my parents better than she liked me and my sister. I can't imagine why...



Wachi Ohana.

Two things. Sorry about the monotonous background...but the ones on the beach were kinda weird, which I suppose would have been more entertaining. And also sorry for the blurriness. The truth is the photographer's website outsmarted me, and I was tired of dealing with it. So of course, it was iPhone to the rescue...which also explains the off-centeredness.

I'm not really sure if I see the difference between these "professional" photos and the ones we stage ourselves.



At Mama's Fish House in Kuau.

I'm pretty shame to admit that I got sucked into watching the season premiere of the Bachelor (thanks a lot, Jeannie). But, the first few episodes are always the most entertaining. This twist this year is that this bachelor has a kid...which unsurprisingly brings out the maternal instincts (real or not) of all the ladies. Out of no where, one of the lovely ladies professes her secret desire to be a 1st grade teacher because it's "the most challenging...but the most rewarding...but challenging". There was of course other craziness to be had: one girl ambushed him in the car due to her lack of QT earlier in the day. His face when he stepped in the car was truly one of panic. I can relate.

But my favorite line of the evening came from Molly, a blonde.

Bachelor: Do you have any talents?
Molly, the blonde: I'm a great kisser!

Hahaha! I'm pretty sure that's not what he meant (maybe, maybe not)...but I suppose that is a talent. She just proclaimed it with such gusto that I couldn't stop laughing.

And that's why I watched...but no more, well...perhaps next week...if there's no Lakers (or any basketball) game on.

A Hui Hou

Pronounced "ah-who-ee-ho"

...or until we meet again.

Today is my last day of bumming it at home. After 3 weeks of Maui, I'm pretty ready to head back to my everyday life, but I'm having a little separation anxiety with the...

1. Weather. Admittedly, the weather hasn't been the greatest due to our wet winter. But, I love how you can still wear shorts in the rain. And the possibility of a rainbow. And not having to bring a jacket everywhere "just in case".

2. Wailuku tap water. I don't know what it is about this straight-from-the-faucet water, but I always look forward to it. I have yet to find out what they put in that Iao Aquifer to make the water so tasty. Or maybe I don't want to know.

3. Ocean. When I first moved to California, not being able to see the ocean everyday was somewhat unnerving to me. So blue and pretty.

4. Pidgin. If there's anything that makes me homesick, it's hearing Hawaii people conversing in pidgin on the mainland. Not that it's the most graceful speaking form (far from it, in fact). But, its simplicity and ease makes me feel all warm and fuzzy.

5. Food. All the food. I don't even know where to start with this...and I don't really want to because I'm really hungry right now, and I can smell my neighbor cooking up some spam for dinner.



Loco Moco. A giant hamburger patty (hamburger steak in Hawaii) with two easy over eggs all bathed in a brown gravy with mushrooms and onions...made a complete meal with 1 scoop rice and 1 scoop mac salad. One of my favs. I usually order this up at Da Kitchen, where it coupled with a health warning...something something high blood pressure, consult your physician.



Chicken Katsu. One of the few things I won't attempt to make at home because I know I can't even come close to this golden brown deliciousness.



And of course the fish. Raw, cooked or both.

6. Roaming wild animals. I love seeing the wild chickens on the side of the road and the cows and goats grazing in open space at the bottom of the hill. For a week, I very much looked forward to seeing my llama out and about. However, that myth has been debunked. He's a goat. I'm crushed.



My chocolate brown llama/goat. More goat than llama. Ok...all goat. Sad.

This was the original sighting that made me believe he was a llama.



Slightly pixelated. But look at those ears! I didn't think goats had such floppy ears.

I decided to celebrate my last day here not at the beach, but instead cracking macadamia nuts at my Uncle Eric's house. He lives in a new development called Wailuku Country Estates, which used to just field and fields of macadamia nut trees. The lots are about 2 acres or so, but the catch is that you have to use some of the land for agricultural purposes. Hence my Uncle's 9 macadamia nut trees, handful of banana and local orange trees, and extensive herb and Manoa lettuce garden.



The mac nut cracking process. My Uncle's in-laws are in town, so his father-in-law helped me. That bowl took us 2 hours to fill...and it's not even full! Figures why they're so pricey.

All that peeling got me hungry, so my Uncle took me out for lunch at Cafe O'Lei.



Maui beef burger. I can't get enough of these. Cows that carry the name "Maui Beef" have been grass fed and allowed to roam and graze, and are only fed grain in their last few months of existence before becoming a yummy hamburger or steak.



Blackened Mahi with fruit relish. Nicole always gets this.

I had a few things to take care of at the State Office...and I saw this sign while waiting.



This was at 9:15am. I won't miss Hawaiian time too terribly.

Covert Op

If not cooking, my dream career would be something stealthy...with the CIA...like my hero, Sydney Bristow in Alias...complete with code names!

But since that's not happening any time soon, I decided to embark on my own covert operation today and explored a new house in the neighborhood.

Hmm...actually, "house" is an understatement...it's more of a huge estate situated at the very top of Wailuku Heights on our little (well, not so little) red dirt patch. It's so high up that you can clearly see it from the bottom of the hill. So of course, I've been curious.

It's somewhat secure as you can see...



Enough to deter the common spy, I'm sure.



Luckily, I am not the common spy. What do we have here? A little opening!

We were welcomed by some very unwelcoming signs.



Hmm...I don't suppose they mean me, too? Oh well.

The driveway was insanely steep.



From what I can tell, this is going to be quite the home.



Taken from the yard. I like how it's all cozied up against the mountains.

Because this house is so high, it has a completely unobstructed view of Maui.



South Maui (Kihei/Wailea). This is my favorite view from my house, too.



Central Maui (Kahului).

And they have such a pretty, landscaped yard. The little rolling hills reminds me of Makawao.



However, it worries me that they built so close to the edge!



Yikes!

Funny...I didn't see any cameras!



Umm...should I have left a note that it's "you're"?

Aloha Oe...

You smell like poi...

By this time tomorrow, Nicole will be back in Northern California, where she will be greeted by 43-degree weather and clouds. But I don't feel too bad for her because she'll be back in 11 weeks for spring break. Hmph.

So to assuage her grief, we ventured to Cliffhouse in Kapalua. It's not a beach as much as it is rocky, but it's extremely picturesque, peaceful and ideal for some amateur snorkeling. For this all day excursion, we loaded up with $30 worth of spam musubi, hot dog musubi and breaded teriyaki bento from Takamiya Market in Happy Valley. Buying bento at Takamiya always brings me back to my Wailuku Elementary field trip days.



Mmm...I love those red Maui hot dog musubis.

Cliffhouse is a little off the beaten path...as you can see.



And dangerous is right! I almost tripped over a cord and slipped on some rocks and suffered an attack from a few rouge tree branches.

But the view from the trail sort of compensates for my scrapes.



So pretty and clear.



At Cliffhouse. Even though you can see the rocks pretty easily, the water is quite deep...at least 10-15 feet would be my guess.

My tube was put to good use today during my mini snorkeling excursion, where I saw lots of colorful fishies, sea urchins...and!!! Hawaii's state fish, the humuhumunukunukuapuaa...humus for short. Puaa means pig in Hawaiian, and supposedly, this little fishy's nose resembles a pig.



Cute, huh?

I found a flat rock to cruise on. And this is what it looked like below.



The rocks were pretty jagged and slippery, which was solved by Nicole's idea of wearing tabi's. Yeah, they were hideous, but we had many jealous stares from onlookers when they saw how fast we scaled the rocks.



Yet, despite our tabi's Nicole still managed to sustain a minor injury to her knee when the current shoved her into Fafa Island. She would.



Fafa "Island" is that giant rock on the right.

And to top it all off, my dad was going through his magazine collection and found this 2003 SI issue featuring Kobe.



But of course, he had to add that Lebron was also mentioned in another article. To which I replied, "Yeah, but who's on the cover? I thought so."

Recently, he's been making headlines. Poor Lebron...getting teased for his crab dribble/travel.

Honolulu Highlights

Vacations within vacations.

And last weekend was exactly that when on a little trip to visit Jenney and Chad.

And as with most vacations, there was lots (and lots) of eating involved!

We (Brent, Jenney, Chad and I) first went to Indigo, which is this cute little bar/restaurant in town and whose claim to fame is their $4 martini specials. Because there were 4 of us, we were able to sample just about every one of the 12-15 or so martinis on the list. I'm not a huge martini fan, but these were quite tasty. I really enjoyed the orange blossom cosmo...but Jenney and I decidely did not enjoy the en fuego, complete with pepperoncini water and tabasco. Yuck and confusing.

We then explored the local art galleries in celebration of First Friday. And look who we ran into...



Me, Mufi Hannemann (aka Mayor of Honolulu) and Jenney. Truth be told, we were looking for him because we heard he would be out and about for his inaguration party. We just ran up to him and asked him for a picture...see what a few martinis can do for your self-confidence?

Mufi is a regular celeb in the islands...so there wasn't much that could top this experience. Except perhaps breakfast at Rainbows Drive In.



Is there anything better than barbecue beef, rice and mac salad at 10:30am? Is there?

Maybe a malasada for dessert?



Especially if said malasada is from Leonard's! I've been coming here since I was little, and the malasadas are always warm, light, crispy on the outside and sugary. Malasadas are a Portugese donut...but it's much lighter, and slightly more chewy in the center.

To re-build our appetites, we took a very nice (but lengthy) drive to Kahuku on Oahu's north shore. It was very scenic going through the H3 and Kaneohe Bay...and Kaaawa and Hauula...and Laie...and everything else along Kamehameha Hwy. But it was worth it for the most part. Romy's was sooooo yummy!



Butter and Garlic Kahuku shrimp on rice, of course.



Romy's is also farms their shrimp in these ponds.

On the way back, we drove past some more well-known spots, like Pipeline, Sunset Beach, Turtle Bay and Waimea Bay. Even though it was super windy/choppy/overcast, there were quite a few beachers...and people in trees.

In keeping with the hole-in-the-wall theme for eating, we visited Choon Chun Chicken for dinner. I like saying it. Choon Chun. Anyway, this little Korean places serves up, what else? Chicken, and lots of it.



Honey Barbecue Chicken.



Choon Chun Chicken. They prepare it for you tableside. I enjoyed the plethora of veggies and yummy sauce.

And after all that spicy food, Bubbies was a must. Bubbies is a cute, gourmet ice cream shop specializing in mochi ice cream. But they are equally well-known for their salacious naming conventions on their menu. Check it out.



I just had the mochi ice cream...lychee, guava and sakura. I believe the others pictured are gingerbread (yuck...think straight ginger), chocolate eggnog (sounds yuck...but Chad liked it), strawberry, green tea and vanilla.



Mochi ice cream mountain.

We didn't wake up early enough for breakfast this morning...which was fine because this allowed me to watch the Baltimore/Miami game...equally satisfying. But, we did venture over to Chinatown for some dim sum at Wonkee.



I love the little steamed manapuas the best. The bread is so light and fluffy!

We then went for a brief tour of some unsavory sections of Honolulu...I believe near Aala Park. At least it was broad daylight...and there were several cops speeding around...in Camry's no less. Tinted windows, too. Hmph. Figures.

And of course, no trip to Honolulu is complete without a trip to Waiola Shave Ice. The ice shavings are incredibly light and fine, such that they absorb the syrup soooo perfectly. No chewing necessary.



This is Jenney's rainbow shave ice. I had the same thing, but with condensed milk...so my colors weren't as vibrant.

And now, back to Maui.